I Love This Guy

I've never watched "Fear Factor" before, but the promos featuring this guy made me tape last night's show. You see, he is missing three toes and he kept sticking his foot out of the water to flash (or rather, flex) everybody the "Peace" sign. Depending on how long you've known me, you'll laugh your ass off, too. At first he was telling people it was from an alligator attack, then later he came clean and said he had been in a motorcycle accident.

And because I hate inside jokes, allow me to explain how funny this is to me. I only have eight toes- I'm missing the two that this guy has as well as a big chunk (including the ball) of my foot. My foot almost looks like a reverse image of this guy's. The ironic part is I tell people it was a shark attack because it makes me sound tough. But I always come clean and tell them about that nasty run-in I had with a riding lawnmower when I was a kid. I think this explains why I laugh in the face of vanity. Especially when someone says "My feet are soooo ugly, I've got the ugliest feet in the woooorld....." and a lot of people say this, trust me. Oh yeah? Well, let's compare feet and I bet I'll win that contest. Ok, so I've only played that card maybe twice in my life but I tell you what, it made some very vain people shut up and rethink their low self image.

Grossness over.